Today is a new day. Day 1 of something that looks a little like the beginning of the end. I have been much much quieter on here than last year. Six lockdowns have been rough, and I don’t want to make too much of the fact that Melbourne has apparently been through the longest lockdown in the world. Frankly, that line doesn’t even begin to touch on all the feelings I have in me right now. Especially today, when I’m thinking of all the families and friends who’ve lost loved ones, and when I’m thinking of all my own friends who are healthcare workers bracing for more cases. I’m relieved and anxious and trepidatious and sad and hopeful and grateful and vaguely optimistic and most of all, very, very blessed indeed. Last year, I did two lockdowns of isolation creation every single day, and that was really helpful in grounding me through some really personally touch times and especially in a lockdown. This year we went in and out of three lockdowns, and that was a different kind of exhaustion to have to deal with opening and closing and a whole lot of uncertainty. And then came lockdown 6 which has just been the culmination of two very very long years, and it’s not over yet. It’s far from over. I’m happy, I am, and I’m also at a point where almost everything in my life seems up in the air. So it’s really just me taking everything one day at a time, not pushing myself to be creative or to make new art. Letting books and words and poetry heal me. Letting myself think and feel and not push anything down or hide it away. Letting my imagination grow wide and soft. Because that’s the thing isn’t it. This world makes us hard and unfeeling and uncaring. And the most radical thing we can do is to not give in to that pressure and to fight to keep ourselves soft.
—Nat ❤🥀